Crazy Uncle George's Blog
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Wednesday, March 22, 2006
The Fantastic One
I can't believe how long it's been since the last time I blogged. I just updated the page for the first time this calendar year about a week ago, with those Natalie Portman shots I'd had half done way back then. I'd just been so busy with work.
It seems like I never had a free moment, until a little while ago, I sat Dick down and said, "Look, you've got to stop shooting people in the face. I can't be covering all these things up. I need to update the friggin' web page!" In the meantime, the web page has been stagnant. Take a look at our traffic in the graphic on the left. The far left is the week from December 4th to December 11th (the first week we were on this Linux server -- we used to be on some Windows one), and the far right is the week from March 12th to March 19th. At some point (not necessarily our peak) our domain was ranked in the 700,000s for traffic, but since I haven't been doing anything it slipped into the 900,000s.
Well, I intend to fix this lack of updates, and the first thing I did after the Natalie Portman update was to break the rules I set up just the last blog entry. I added Jessica Alba, who's probably the hottest girl I hadn't put up on the page so far (I assume in my top 5, which is very hard to do as I keep track of thousands of girls), and put up 43 shots (as usual, not the whole collection) instead of my usual non-Beckinsale quota of 40.
Basically what's going on is that I'm scrapping limits altogether. It occurred to me when I was doing Jessica that I can't base the picture number on hotness alone, as some girls like Jessica seem to be caught in hot photos like the weather, while others like say, Kelly Clarkson, just never seem to take off any clothing. And these shots of Jessica are from so many different occasions and look so different, so there should be more of them. Maybe I should do some DVD captures. I've got Into the Blue getting shipped here, so I can stop looping the two seconds or so of Fantastic 4 where she's in her underwear.
Anyway, I've got so many shots from last year that I have to get through and then they'll be up on the site. I already have my Paris Hilton collection ready to go, except that it needs thumbnails and I have to write a description and think up some corny pun referencing her first name or her sex tape. I've been reading that apparently the company that originally distributed Paris Hilton's first sex tape did get the tape from her ex, who had earlier been selling copies of the footage on his personal website. Paris did sue a website over the tape, but it was a middleman-type company, not the company behind it all, as that company's giving her a cut of the profits.
The same company is currently trying to get Kid Rock and Scott Stapp (lead singer of Creed before going solo) to drop their lawsuits about a tape of them getting blowjobs from groupies, as if that's going to be some huge cash crop. They're out of their minds. We want to see the Paris sex tape because she's hot as hell and we want to see her get fucked. But who cares about a tape of male musicians getting oral sex? Are we supposed to be shocked that groupies give blowjobs? That's the whole point of their existence. For God's sake, the tape isn't even of them having intercourse or anal sex. I just find it a little weird that they're getting fellatio together. Knowing those two, they probably need to look at each other's dicks to get it up...