Crazy Uncle George's Blog
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Sunday, April 6, 2008
Every Day Is April Fools
So today I was checking up on Hillary. She's amusing, because she's like watching a worse version of Mitt, where instead of admitting past mistakes like he and that other Massachusetts flip-flop did, she tries to deny the past exists and
hopes that some elementary spin will cover it up. But she's dishin' out the whoppers like never before, which I guess is a sort of desperation play. My ratings are in the toilet, so I might want to give that a spin, no pun intended. She's claiming to be ducking sniper fire that doesn't exist, opening borders that were already opened the day before, predicting a housing bubble-based credit crunch leading to a recession years before it happened and being at work warning everyone for all those years, and negotiating peace in Northern Ireland without being at the talks. She seems to have "misspoken" an awful lot. (I have to get my hands on these Hillary euphemisms. Even Karl can't keep on pace with her.) But today was the biggest of all. Hillary's claiming to have invented the Internet.
I started laughing and told her it was a great April Fools' Day joke, and she's like, "George, it's April 6th." So I was all, "No, silly, April Fools' Day is April 1st." She's gone a little off the deep end, though. She's also claiming that Jennifer Cavilleri from Love Story is based on her, that she single-handedly discovered Love Canal (not the toxic waste problem in the canal, but the canal itself), and that she won the Miss Black Nevada pageant in 1984, 1986, and 1987. I would have told her that it's time for her to get some sleep and salvage her dignity, but it's just too funny the other way.
In the meantime, I have to update some galleries so I can push Britney Spears off the update list. I've had some long-overdue shots to put up that I'd gotten when her looks were in the early stages of their slide, and I'm a little worried that having her up there will drive away traffic. She's really going to have to get a lot hotter before I bother updating her again. These days, seeing Britney's name is like an automatic skip button. I know that these shots on the page are mainly from when she was in her hot period, but still it almost feels embarrassing having her here. Then again, when that comes up, I just remind myself that Michelle Trachtenberg is on the page, too, so it's not like I have standards here. I've also updated Naomi Watts's gallery, but that one's a smaller update. Get ready to see more updates, because I'm not sure if the page is ready for new galleries (i.e. the text portion of the existing galleries might need work first).