Crazy Uncle George's Blog
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Thursday, June 12, 2008
Silencing Scott
So I went out and got Scott McLellan's tell-all book, and soon found out that it didn't have anything to do with NBA conspiracies, so I threw it in the fireplace along with those books on economics, foreign relations, and proper Inglish.
I suppose the fireplace thing would be more dramatic if we ever turned the thing on, but whatevs. But he'd been one of my loyal minions for so long, and now he's going and testifying about the CIA leak business, so somebody's really going to have to tell me what he did for me every day, because I just thought of him as the guy who kept Jolly Ranchers at his desk that I could bum. When Tony went and replaced him, he just had Tootsie Rolls, so I made sure that when Dana moved up to the job, it would be in the contracting that she'd have to stock some Jolly Rancher goodness of multiple varieties.
These days he's always talking about these evils of acting like we're constantly campaigning, i.e. changing policy and message as part of P.R. tactics instead of thinking about honesty and the greater good and whatever. I guess that must narrow down some of this, because with his distaste for P.R. he couldn't have had some position like press secretary.
In the meantime, it looks like Bill Clinton decided to continue the switch from me making him look good to him making me look good, thanks to some P.R. issues of his own. Todd Purdum had written in Vanity Fair about Bill Clinton's life since leaving the presidency, and his staff released a statement so "red-faced" that I had to call animal control to give them a tipoff to the location of some rabid dogs. They went about trying to pick some pointless fight by listing some lawsuits that other people had filed on unrelated issues, but not before going on a long rant about what the Clinton Foundation does, as if Bill Clinton's the only ex-president to ever do charity work and it somehow negates the existence of all unrelated events in his life. It was like having to put up with a duplicate of the South Carolina concession speech he gave for his wife, where we went on and on about his presidential library instead of relevant matters, possibly including the library's top-secret list of donors.
I have a list for you that's not top-secret, though. It's the updates at this page o' hotties. There are slight additions to the Michelle Behennah and Ashley Judd galleries, and a completely new gallery for Julianne Hough. Look for me to do a lot of quick updates of existing galleries over the next week, so I can whittle down my stack before I start throwing some new girls onto the site.